How to Talk Dirty to Your Lover (Without Feeling Silly)

How to talk dirty to your lover

We’re excited to partner with We-Vibe to celebrate their 10th anniversary and share how you can #ExplorePlayDiscover more with your lover. Read our tips on dirty talk and why we love the We-Vibe 10th Anniversary Collection. This post contains affiliate links.

How to talk dirty to your lover

Movies and romance books make uttering naughty words look so effortless. Then you try whispering the same sexy words to your lover and felt silly as soon as they left your mouth.


When done right, dirty talk can melt your panties and make cocky veins pulse. Whispering (or screaming) about pleasure during sex can intensify intimacy and passion. Hearing your lover whisper how they want to touch you or how you’ll make him gasp and moan–not only is it erotic, but it boosts your confidence in the bedroom. Who doesn’t want to please their lover?

Don’t give up on talking dirty while you’re doing the nasty. It doesn’t have to be complicated. We’ve put together some tips that will make dirty talk less embarrassing and more erotic.

How to Talk Dirty to Your Lover

Practice with someone else’s words. Try reading out sex scenes from romance and erotica novels to each other. Take turns reading the lines of dialogue and see if you can make it the end of the chapter.

If you need some inspiration, try our Pleasure Pairings for steamy excerpts.

You don’t have to be Shakespeare or Pablo Neruda. There’s no Pulitzer Prizes for dirty talk. No judges with scorecards. The only person who cares is your lover. You know what turns on your partner. If something doesn’t work, try something else.

Sext it. No need to wait until your rip each other’s clothes off to start dirty talk. Texting naughty nothings to each other is also great foreplay. Things you can text your partner:

  • I’m not wearing any panties right now
  • I keep fantasizing about wearing my We-Vibe to the concert while you control it
  • I get hot every time I think about what we did last night

Change your voice. Changing the pitch of your voice can dramatically increase your Little Mermaid vocal powers. Think lower, slightly deeper, and a little bit breathy. Practice on your own until it feels natural.

What should I say during dirty talk?

Amy Schumer sit on my face

Half the battle of talking dirty is what to say. Being clever can be challenging when you’re in a lust-filled fog. Here’s some dirty talk conversation starters to try:

  • Share how horny you are and how you want to be touched
  • Tell your lover how wet or hard you are (don’t forget the lube!)
  • Describe how you want to lick, kiss, suck, etc your lover
  • Talk about how you touch yourself when you think of your lover–bonus if you use a toy like the We-Vibe Tango
We Vibe Anniversary Collection
We Vibe Anniversary Collection with Tango and Sync


Remember it’s ok if you feel a little bit silly. You’re trying something new. Once you let go of how you think you sound, you’re going to have some hot sex!


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